Daddy definitely gets the award for nighttime parenting in this house. Since I was a little girl I have been a morning person. Up with the sun and down with the sun. When I had children, the hardest thing for me was sleep. How do you sleep with a baby waking you up to nurse or for comfort every hour or so. We had to get creative. Having an involved husband who wanted to be an equal parent was so important. John has always been a night person, so he offered to sleep with the baby in another room and bring him to me to nurse when needed. He has developed such a wonderful trust and bond with each one of our children due to his dedication to nighttime parenting. I know it is not easy for him, but even at 2am he has a loving, gentle, and patient response to all of us. I can not say the same for myself. Just last night my 5 year old son came into my room crying with leg pains and woke me from a deep sleep. I think of myself as a caring and loving Mom, but I just told him to go back to bed and stop waking me up. Wow, mean mommy right? I wonder what is the matter with me that I can't seem to be that same caring and loving Mom at any time of day or night. I remember as a child going into my Mom's bed at night and how safe I felt. Why can't I give that to my children. Well, one thing I have learned as a Mom is that we can't do it all, all the time. I am human and I think my kids know that. I have places where I am limitless and others where my limits are well defined. I just feel so lucky that when I am not available to comfort my kids they have someone else that loves them just as much and makes himself available to them, even in the middle of the night. I woke up this morning to find that both my 8 month old and 5 year old sons slept with daddy last night. My heart felt gladness and gratitude for this. As tired as we all can be sometimes with young children, these moments really do make up the times of our lives. Now that it is morning, Mommy's back and ready to have some fun (I'm letting John sleep in while I make him pancakes). By sharing the "burdens" and the joys, we really are sharing this parenting journey.
5 comments:
Very sweet shot! you look very happy and awake (in spite of it all!) This is a great description of how you and your husband work together. I think having that kind of support helps us be able to become aware of our limits in a safe environment - a place where acceptance and growth work together! LOVE this!
Thanks Adrienne. Sometimes we think we have to do it all, but when we work together everyone benefits.
Love the picture of the three of you.
Such a great routine you have set up, I wish I could say it was the same here, but sadly it is not. In reality though I am okay with that, I do much better at handling the sleep deprivation than my husband :) I guess it is about finding what works and going with it.
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